Box Office: A “bombs away” weekend for “Angry Birds,” “47 Meters,” “Bernadette” and “Good Boys?”


To be blunt, none of them are any good.

But you have to, when you’re reviewing the Dogs of August, forget the month you’re watching the movie in. Because every now and then, a good movie that nobody could figure out how to market slips out in August.

Still, at some point during “Angry Birds #2,” you think, “Yeah, if this had been any good they would have given summer kiddie audience pop the chance to find it.”

Can I just say how insane this Rottentomatoes rating for “Angry Birds 2” seems to me? It rises to mediocre, here and there. Barely a laugh in it. The Sat. AM screening where I saw it had people and their kids walking out at about the one hour mark. Life is indeed too short. Metacritic gives it a barely-worth-considering (much less bothering with) 60.

Kudos to Universal Studios marking, They sold the hell out of “Good Boys,” but where’s the good movie?”

It did over $2 million last night, and there was a big crowd at the Thursday night showing I caught of this one. Many of them were tweens, whose Seth Rogen-ish parents bought them the R-rated tickets and left them there. Good parenting. At least they weren’t laughing. Much.

(The Hollywood Reporter mocks the Box Office Mojo prediction, saying $20 million is within reach each after that big Thursday night.)

There’s a “No wonder Annapurna Pictures has gone broke” thought as you try to make yourself charmed or amused by the debacle that is “Where’d You Go, Bernadette.”

Will “Good Boys” manage $12 million? Maybe. Same with “Birds.”

Neither has a prayer of staying on screens long enough to be a “Booksmart” or “Angry Birds #1.”

“47 Meters Down: Uncaged” won’t clear $10, and even that is ill-gotten gains for a movie that had little talent in front of or behind the camera, none that registered in the finished film, anyway.

“Bernadette” is a total write off.

“Hobbs & Shaw” will win the weekend without even trying. Maybe $13-14 million will do the trick.

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