Netflixable? What happens in “Ibiza” stays in “Ibiza?”

ibiza1

How much longer is that nasal, New York princess drawled “Yaaaaaaas” going to be funny? Just in terms of cultural currency?

It’s an essential comic component of the latest “Bridesmaids/Girl’s Trip” variation, “Ibiza,” now on Netflix. As in, the screenwriter got a credit, but the way Gillian Jacobs, SNL’s Vanessa Bayer and Phoebe Robinson toss it around, it’s not likely a deserved credit.

Any impending dead spot gets a “Yaaaaaaas,” often delivered by Bayer, and generally delivered through her nose. She is the mistress of this catch-phrase du jour. It’s almost funny the first five or so times you hear it.

“Ibiza” is about a marketing/PR striver named Harper (Jacobs) who endures Manhattan at its grinding worst, just for the job, just to be insulted by her narcissistic shrew of a boss (Michaela Watkins, starring in a FAR meaner/funnier movie) on her four year anniversary, or close to it.

“I’ve decided it’s time to send you on a little business trip.”

“Well, you did send me to Roanoke, Va.”

“I apologize. We paid for your hospital bill. Let’s move on.

A Spanish sangria bottler wants to crack the U.S. market. Barcelona it is. Harper is off to close the deal with “a bunch of horny Spaniards.” That’s the queue for whiny princess dentists Nikki (Bayer) and bold woman of action Leah (Robinson) to tag along.

Work? Sure. After we’ve riffed about the disgusting stuff you see when you turn on a black light in a hotel room, bad a tanning accident accident and been exposed to a penis-painted-on-the-face prank that’s only visible under black light.

Clubs, after hours parties, hookah hits and booze boss Hernando’s invitation to enjoy “food, drink smiles and eye-opening sexual experiences” are the one thing that leads to another. The drunken pursuit of the sexy DJ Leo (Richard Madden) is actually what sends them offshore.

Frank banter about sex, the lack of it and “oversharing, OVERsharing!,” open-topped taxi rides and a “Sure Thing” pursuit among a sea of drunken driving “horny Spaniards” ensues.

“He’s not TECHNICALLY my boyfriend, but his name’s Diego and I’m PRETTY SURE I’m going to be having sex with him soon!”

Club scenes that go on forever, hot tub moments that go…well you know.

“This is just a moment. I’m having a moment. It’s more about the drugs and…Spain…”

ibiza2

The objective is to get uptight, downtrodden Harper to live a little, cut loose. If we bought Gillian Jacobs as that, well, it would help.

There are plenty of actors who admit they take roles just for the travel. Honest ones in the Michael Caine tradition. So ladies, fess up. Because this script doesn’t explain it, these trite roles don’t do it. It’s a “Girl’s Trip” that never leaves the tarmac.

Ibiza looks lovely, though if you’ve seen one thumping movie neon-and-strobe-filled nightclub, you’ve seen them all.

“Ibiza” is just…boring.

1half-star

MPAA Rating: TV-MA, substance abuse, profanity, sexual content

Cast: Gillian Jacobs,  Vanessa Bayer, Phoebe Robinson, Felix Gomez, Richard MaddenMichaela Watkins

Credits:Directed by Alex Richanbach, script by  Lauryn Kahn. A Gary Sanchez/Netflix release.

Running time: 1:34

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Reviews, previews, profiles and movie news. Bookmark the permalink.