Movie Review: “How Dark They Prey,” How bad can it be?

Well, there’s an hour of my life I’ll never get back.

“How Dark They Prey” is a quartet of ineptly-scripted, randomly-assembled, adequately-shot but amateurishly-acted short horror films that fall under the broad horror subheading of “claptrap.”

They include the worst written, acted and envisioned World War II short I have ever seen. And I’ve judged student films, “48 Hour Film Project” saps and worse. There’s a demonic slaughter opener that slices up some UFO hucksters. That could have been funny. A black and white finale that begins with a traffic stop isn’t quite up to “student film,” unless we’re talking “middle school” students.

There is absolutely nothing anyone writing, directing or appearing in any of these has to say that would amount to a defense. It’s just rubbish, and never should have seen the light of day. But here it is, pushed by a publicist (waste of money) and rendered legit by its own page on Rotten Tomatoes.

Wait’ll they find out.

Rating: unrated, violence

Cast: Names withheld to protect their acting conservatories, or online thespian courses.

Credits: Scripted and directed Jamison M. LoCascio and Adam Ambrosio. A Film Valor release.

Running time: 1:12

About Roger Moore

Movie Critic, formerly with McClatchy-Tribune News Service, Orlando Sentinel, published in Spin Magazine, The World and now published here, Orlando Magazine, Autoweek Magazine
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