Movie Preview: Elizabeth Olsen’s dead, facing “Eternity” with…Miles Teller?

A24 releasing this in November suggests they consider the picture, with Callum Turner and Da’Vine Joy Randolph, Oscar bait.

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Movie Preview: Ethan Hawke, Margaret Qualley, “Blue Moon,” the make-or-break opening of “Oklahoma!”

Classic Broadway lovers should be chomping at the bit for this Lorenz Hart on the verge of stage immortality with perhaps the greatest Broadway show of them all.

Andrew Scott is his writing partner Richard Rodgers, Simon Delaney is Oscar Hammerstein II, Patrick Kennedy is the writer’s writer E.B. White and Qualley is a woman Hart — possibly gay — had a romantic correspondance with in the days leading up to “Oh what a beautiful morning, oh what a beautiful day.

The director? Richard Linklater, of “Boyhood,” “Dazed and Confused” and most pertinently “Me and Orson Welles.”

Oct. 24

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Movie Review: Damn Right “She Rides Shotgun”

“She Rides Shotgun” is a gripping A-list B-movie, a morally ambigious and illogically logical thriller for our amoral, illogical times.

Based on a novel by Ben Harper, Nick Rowland’s film grabs a solid, time-proven scenario — a child, on the lam and in jeopardy with a dangerous man — and decorates it with showdowns, chases, who-can-you-trust quandaries, to-the-death brawls and shootouts.

In cinema shorthand, it’s a less gonzo “The Professional,” just as moving as “Gloria” and as troubling as a “A Perfect World.”

A nine-year old waits for her ride after school in wintry New Mexico. Her mom is late. Very late. And she’s damned wary of that guy who rolls up in a beater and shouts “You come over here. I just need to talk to you.”

It turns out, that guy is Nathan, her dad (Taron Egerton, pitch-perfect). “Everything’s fine,” he assures her. But he “just got out.” And little Polly (Ana Sophia Heger) isn’t taking anything he says at face value.

She picks up on clues. Her dad is wearing her stepdad’s jacket. The safety glass of the driver’s side window is shattered and sprinkled all over the car

“What have you done to Mom?”

“I haven’t done ANYTHING!”

As we suspect, that’s not entirely true. As they hit the highway, ditch the beater and duck into a cash-only motel, Polly gets her answers. Her parents are dead. There’s a manhunt for her dad.

But as Dad makes frantic calls to one “friend” after another with “I gotta get gone” desperation, we and Polly pick up on the truth. Dad did something that caused the “double homicide” on the TV news, but he didn’t do it himself.

That “A” in a circle tattooed on his neck he got in prison? That’s the Aryan Steel gang. Nathan did something to cross them, and now he’s got a “green light” on him and everyone he holds dear. His advice is blunt and dire, even if it doesn’t go much beyond how to defend yourself with a baseball bat.

“You gotta feel week to get strong…If they’ve hurt people, cracking their heads is not a sin.”

Rob Yang of TV’s “Succession” and “American Rust” plays a police detective on the hunt who figures out this “green light” business early on. How might that tie into the region’s meth wars, the sprawling meth lab they call “Slabtown” and the “God of Slabtown” who runs it?

Egerton is wound up tight as Nathan, but young Miss Heger (“Things Heard & Scene,” TV’s “Life in Pieces”) has to bounce from shocked and sad to confused and distracted to wholly engaged in their enterprise and what must be done to get away, if indeed “getting away” is her best destiny. She’s quite good in the part and makes a scripted character arc that could give you whiplash at least somewhat plausible.

I mean, the kid’s just lost her mother. It should take more than a few hours to get over that.

The many hands in the screenplay serve up a sea of dirty sheriff’s deputies and filthy police with the rare “good” apple, flinty banter about “peckerwood” white supremacist gangs that lord it over law enforcement (David Lyons and the always formidable John Carroll Lynch play cops) and a finale that is cliched mayhem.

It isn’t “The Professional,” Rowland (“Calm with Horses”) isn’t Luc Besson — his pacing’s slack, for starters — and Heger probably won’t turn out to be the next Natalie Portman.

But she’s pretty good and “She Rides Shotgun” is a compelling, gripping B-movie ride, a picture that reaches for highfalutin “Trojan Horse” allegories when what it does best is a lot more obvious. It puts a child we instantly empathize with in jeopardy, and makes us wonder if gangs, cops or her dad are the biggest threat to her well-being.

Rating: R

Cast: Taron Egerton, Ana Sophia Heger, Rob Yang, Odessa A’zion, David Lyons and John Carroll Lynch

Credits: Directed by Nick Rowland, scripted by Jordan Harper, Ben Collins, Luke Piotrowski and Nick Rowland, based on a novel by Harper. A Lionsgate release.

Running time: 2:00

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Movie Preview: The terrors of being on the wrong side of WWII inside “Der Tiger” tank

So, “Das Boat” with a tank?

This looks pretty cool, a timely reminder that heroism is wasted when you’re fighting on behalf of Nazis.

Sept. 18.

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Movie Preview: Ozzy’s dead, perfect time for a taste of “Spinal Tap II”

Ok, I laughed a couple of times.

Relieved that Questlove didn’t buy in as a new drummer.

Sept. 12, The Tap is ON.

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Movie Preview: Brit Horror with serious bonafides — Listen for the “Whistle” 

IFC plucked this one and has it set for 2026 release.

Looks excruciating, but in a good way.

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Movie Review: Insomnia Cure? “Invincible Swordsman”


“Invincible Swordsman” is a slick, beautifully-designed Chinese action fantasy that never escapes the trap of “time suck” that so many Wuxia thrillers fall into.

That’s the period piece martial arts genre that revels in flying fighters and supernatural skills, polished by the centuries and — so the saying goes — lost to the mists of time in our modern age.

Swords spin like power-drills and a hailstorm of needles and threads are as much a menace as any blow delivered by foot or fist. Mystical powers are learned from a “Sunflower Manual,” sought and sucked-up by one shaman/fighter when he or she wins a fight with another.

This film, based on a book by Louis Cha, gets buried early on under exposition, characters, prologue and prosaic lists of arcane Chinese martial arts skills, passed down from master to student.

It’s a tale of intrigues and trickery and murderous battles for supremacy between an ever-expanding “demonic” The Sun Moon Holy Cult and that the Mount Hua Sect, one martial arts/religious group to oppose their domination.

Invincible East (Yuqi Zhang) seizes power from the murderous cult leader Ren Woxing (Terence Yin) in a mountaintop battle. Things promise to be just as murderous under new management as they were under the old regime.

Star Mount Hua student Linghu Chong (Tim Huang) would rather lose himself in his music on the Cliffs of Contemplation than do battle. He’s become friends with the deposed Ren daughter (Lu Xuan) and her pal/confidante Blue Phoenix (Cai Xiangyu) via music. But other members of the Mount Hua sect recognize this for the threat that it is.

Only the intervention of Master Feng, played by the venerable martial arts choreographer and star Sammo Hung, keeps Linghu from utter banishment.

But when he meets the fair Ms. Invincible East by “chance,” he is smitten. The fact that she won’t tell him her name lets us know where all this is going.

There is a lot of movie, filled with preliminary flirtations, bouts, debates and betrayals, before we get to the inevitable third act showdown. Things turn tedious and repetitious early and director Yiwei Luo’s pacing is right up there with the slowest and most sluggish “Harry Potter” movies.

One set-piece scene is illustrative of this film’s can’t-get-us-to-the-(Black)-forest-because-it’s-distracted by-the-trees problems. Master Feng teaches Linghu the nine “stances” one must master with a sword in a fight by flinging black and white discs from the ancient game “Go” at him.

“Sword swinging stance! Sword falling stance! Sword evading stance! Sword disorder stance! Sword defeating stance!” On and on this goes, a cliched “training” scene that has a lot less purpose than its inclusion in the script lets on.

Linghu must learn that “Loneliness is not the same as solitude,” (in Mandarin Chinese with subtitles). But must he? Dude’s never alone. Women like the handsome lad’s company, some more than others.

Fights erupt, body parts are occasionally hacked off, often returning to their owner via magic. And somebody covets the “Three Corpse Brain Pill” as a reward for getting his hands on the Sunflower Manual.

It’s all played at a humorless pitch, a pretty cast in a pretty-looking movie that plays as pretty pointless.

Rating: unrated, action/fantasy violence, dismemberment

Cast: Yuqi Zhang, Tim Huang, Sammo Hung, Lu Xuan and Terence Yin.

Credits: Directed by Yiwei Luo, scripted by Jin Wong, based on a novel by Louis Cha. A Well Go USA release.

Running time: 2:00

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Classic Film Review: Burt, Booty, Brigands and Brigantines — “The Crimson Pirate” (1952)

“The Crimson Pirate?” Yarrrrr, there’s a pirate picture with teeth!

Gore Verbinski borrowed from a parade of pirate movies when he concocted Disney’s “Pirates of the Caribbean” franhcise, none more than this jaunty romp from 1952.

Warner Bros. gave star Burt Lancaster the keys to the bank for this 1952 Technicolor, Italian-location spectacle, with sailing ships and satin shirts and Burt and his lifelong pal and acrobatic partner Nick Cravat put on a stunt show worthy of its own theme park attraction.

It’s barely more piratical than those singing, dancing “Pirates of Penzance,” a sailing saga that’s silly down to its knickers — or pirate “petticoat breeches.” But boy oh, is it a hoot.

Lancaster, with Cravat, faces the camera in the film’s opening scene and addresses the crew and the audience.

“Remember, in a pirate ship, in pirate waters, in a pirate world, ask no questions. Believe only what you see. No, believe half of what you see!”

But those stunts? All that climbing and swinging and tumbling? Believe that.

Lancaster is Captain Vallo, who leads a crew of twenty or so swabs on his trusty barkentine, the Lydia, in the late (ish) 18th century. They’re doing what pirates did back then, preying on Spanish galleons and men-of-war.

How does a crew from a tiny, flying jib two-masted ship capture a three-masted 30-gun Spanish frigate? By playing dead, “a scurvy ship” taken in tow by the Baron Gruda (Leslie Bradley). Those corpses come to life when the timing’s right.

“You may be over-confident, Captain Vallo. There are 200 of the King’s marines aboard this vessel!”

“And only 20 pirates. That puts the odds slightly in my favour. Better surrender the ship!”

Captain Vallo polishes off this bravado with a toothy grin. Lancaster grins so much in this action comedy he’s practically a parody of his “image” — lithe, athletic, tossled reddish blonde hair and teeth.

The cunning captain hears what Gruda’s mission is and is all ears. (And teeth.) The Baron is traveling to some (fictional) islands in a sea that may or may not be Caribbean with orders and troops enough to put down a rebellion. The locals want independence, and a figure nicknamed El Libre may be close to providing it.

What if the pirate sails into port on the baron’s ship, takes over the baron’s mission and sells the baron’s guns and powder to the rebels? How about kidnapping El Libre and selling him to the baron in the bargain?

“Gather round, lads!” I tellya, there’s FLORINS to be make if we play all the angles.

But of course El Libre has a daughter, the fair Consuelo (Eva Bartok, fiesty). That has the skipper figuring that maybe there’s another angle to play here, one with curves.

The baron and assorted officials must be foiled and fooled, and a “by the (pirate) book” piratical first mate Humble Bellows (Thorin Thatcher, magnificent) must be placated or fended off.

“We got regular pirate business to settle. We got the plank, the culprit and the verdict. All we need’s a trial, an execution and a sentence!”

Vallo and his mute lieutent Ojo (Cravat) cheat death a dozen times, shimmy up masts and swing from ropes, tumble through town and dress in drag. All in a good day’s fun.

“This one can’t talk, and this one can’t keep quiet!”

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Movie Preview: Love, Longing and Song-catching in Appalachia — “A History of Sound”

Paul Mescal and Josh O’Connor star in this Bluegrass “Brokeback,” narrated by Oscar winner Chris Cooper (perfect) as an old man of the mountains who remembers that first great love — music — and the second, a fellow he met as they searched for and collected tunes in early 20th century Appalachia.

Looks like a mashup of Maggie Greenwald’s “Songcatcher” and many a same sex romance period piece, although I do love the alliteration of “Bluegrass ‘Brokeback Mountain.'”

“The History of Sound,” directed by Oliver Hermanus and scripted by Ben Shattuck, played at Cannes and opens Sept. 12.

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Documentary Review: Teens ease the transition to adulthood via The Outdoors, Sled Dogs and “Folktales”

It’s billed as “the best years of your life,” the teenaged Romain complains in “Folktales,” the new documentary about teens, sled dogs and the wilderness “Folk” schools of Norway. Socially maladjusted, shy and withdrawn Romain has figured out that the teen years have been over-hyped and oversold by Western culture.

“Everyone wants to be teenagers except for teenagers!”

And if you’re not coping with and thriving in your teens, how’s that transition to “adulthood” supposed to work?

Norway’s thesis — the modern world is a fast-paced/knowledge-packed overload on human brains that haven’t changed since the hunter-gatherer era. Why not offer teens a gap-year school (the first ones opened in the 1840s) where they fill the gap getting in touch with the wild, their ability to cope with it and handle the sled dogs necessary to survive above the Arctic Circle?

It’s hard to overstate just how warm and affecting this film, by “Jesus Camp” and “The Boys of Baraka” filmmakers Heidi Ewing and Rachel Grady, turns out to be.

The kids aren’t so “troubled” with a capital “T” and this Pasvik Folk School on the Russian border that they attend isn’t Outward Bound. But take a bunch of willing students, socially awkward, sad or “lost,” make them care for, work with and bond with sled dogs with the edict “You are responsible for another living creature,” and keep the kids in the wild long enough and maybe they’ll “wake up your Stone Age brain” and grow up.

Hege is a clubbing but grieving city girl who lost her biker-father, but connects the idea of attending this school with outdoor experiences she experienced with her father.

Bjorn, a self-described “nerd” and “liar” (the film is mostly in English, with some Norwegian and Dutch with subtitles), frets over an inability to make friends and the lonely future that foretells.

And Romain is a Dutch Gen Z stereotype — disengaged, unwilling to even try to learn to build a fire, tentative about literally everything, even bonding with a dog.

That’s a social anxiety that this school can help him with, as dogs “unlock something inside a person,” one instructor observes. The dogs are “just a “method” of helping these teens “find a better version of yourself.” The idea is teach us “to be more human, maybe more patient.”

Nobody has to surrender their cell phone. But over the course of a school year that begins as the midnight sun summer ends, passes through “the long night” of winter and ends in spring, many will find the world they’re in a lot more interesting than anything digital at their fingertips.

Ewing and Grady don’t oversell the transformation these children — some of them plainly pretty privileged — go through. This isn’t a “scared straight” experience, rescuing kids “in the system” from a violent, disadvantaged future.

But watching unhappy, uncertain children grow in confidence as they learn, bond and then run loving, yipping, straining sled dogs is incredibly touching.

They camp out under the spectacular Northern Lights, cope with the consequences of not listening to their instructors about hats and gloves and setting up tents (snow will collapse one if you don’t do that right).

And then as Ewing and Brady pull back to show a parade of kids leading dog teams across the frozen forests of the north, one can’t help but be moved by the beauty of this wild and harsh place and the ingenius idea behind these schools and how much anyone could benefit from that experience.

Rating: unrated, some profanity

Credits: Directed by Heidi Ewing and Rachel Grady. A Magnolia release.

Running time: 1:46

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