Movie Nation

If you’re a parent, chances are you’ve seen worse animated films than “Escape from Planet Earth.” Mostly, one might add, from the same studio that released this one.

But “Earth” is something of a giant – OK, mini-giant – leap forward for The Weinstein Company. It’s not much funnier than most of their earlier fare. But at least it’s not as ugly as “Hoodwinked,” “Doogal” and the rest.

Reaching that “Space Chimps”/”Planet 51” level of good-looking mediocrity is an achievement. Pop the champagne!

The blue aliens of Baab have this Buzz Lightyear-style hero, “Scorch,” a space rescuer-hero whose adventures are covered by live video feed from wherever in the universe he is sent. Scorch is all bravado and swagger and catch-phrase.

“Scorch me, baby!”

He’s a regular rock star — and a bit of a dope. He is voiced by Brendan Fraser.

Dopey Scorch always has his mild-mannered tech-nerd brother Gary (Rob Corddry) back at Mission Control, pulling his blue biscuits out of the fire. Until that day that the egotistical Scorch “fires” Gary.

“I QUIT.”

Same diff. This happens just as Scorch leaves on a mission to “The Dark Planet,” the place where aliens – even those who “come in peace” – disappear. Which is what Scorch does, right in front of the 7-Eleven on the outskirts of Area 51. Yes, the “Dark Planet” is our own — Earth.

Gary’s gung-ho son and ex-test pilot wife (Sarah Jessica Parker) shame him into attempting a rescue. Meanwhile, Scorch is discovering that the team of screenwriters has plagiarized “Monsters vs. Aliens” and that Area 51 is a vast holding pen where Craig Robinson, Jane Lynch (naturally) and George Lopez voice other imprisoned aliens, and William Shatner is the creepy general in charge.

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“Safe Haven,” poor reviews or no, did quite well on Valentine’s Day. Romance novelist Nic Sparks’ adaptation pulled in over $9 million.

“A Good Day to Die Hard” was second, with over $8. It may have earned $40-50 million by midnight Sunday.

“Identity Thief” is hanging around at number 3.

“Beautiful Creatures,” the best reviewed movie of the weekend, did under $3 million for the non-holiday holiday. It could manage $20 this weekend.

The Weinstein Co., too poor to preview its movies for critics any more, has a pitiful record in animation. “Hoodwinked” was sort of a high water mark.

So why throw good money after bad letting critics see it?

“Escape from Planet Earth” has Sarah Jessica Parker and Brendan Fraser providing voices, and a director who has worked on (not as a director) some decent animated films in recent years.

So maybe this isn’t “Arthur and the Invisibles” or (shudder) “Doogal.” Then again, maybe it is.

We’ll see.

It’s the documentary about the song everybody knows, the Jewish “Hokey Pokey,” a staple of weddings, bars this and bats that.

But who knows where it’s from and how it got to be that cross-cultural staple? “Hava Nagila (The Movie)” opens in March. And it has the answers. So they tell me.

Bad reviews, VERY bad, for “A Good Day to Die Hard.” Including mine.

Weaker than weak reviews, VERY WEAK, for “Safe Haven,” another dose of the Nicholas Sparks. Including mine.

And middling reviews for the sassy, drawling “Beautiful Creatures,” which improves on the “Twilight” formula, and does it with witches. My review is more enthusiastic than some, but not all.

What box office future can these three expect? Will “Die Hard” do $50 million, reviews be damned?

I doubt it, though that’s the whispered expectation floating around in speculation land.

Worlds will collide when “Game of Thrones” star Peter Dinklage joins the cast of “X-Men: Days of Future Past.”

IF he joins that cast. Deadline.com describes the Bryan Singer sequel as a mix and match collection of actors/character from both the X-Men prequel, and X-Men movies proper. Might Dinklage be a villain?

It’s another Thursday, which means that I’ll be talking up the week’s new releases at 745 AM on 740 AM-The Game.

Mike Bianchi & I will discuss “A Good Day to Die Hard,” which is getting nuclear reviews. lncluding from me. Say this for Fox. They showed it to critics, looking for good or bad press, which automatically makes this better than “Parker” and other not-really-a-studio releases.

And “Safe Haven,” which is earning shoe bomb reviews.

And “Beautiful Creatures,” which I rather liked and is managing mixed reviews.

“Amour,” the last Oscar nominee to reach much of the country, comes to Enzian Friday.