As I saw parents — well, GRANDparents — gathering the grandkids and emptying their wallets at the ticket counter of a Regal Cinemas in Falwelltown, Va. Friday, I had to shake my head at what they were mostly going to see — at $12 a ticket.
Another Disney “live action” (with lots of CGI) remake of an animated blockbuster — “Moana” was what they’d come to babysit through (the few seniors without kids were seeing “Young Washington”). You couldn’t drag me into Old Man Rock’s Polynesian do-over for love or money.
Audiences legitimized this studio gamble with “Beauty and the Beast,” and tolerated “live action” *all CGI) makeovers of “The Lion King” on down the line.
But Disney’s “re-use old plots/characters to death” strategy has finally hit the wall. “Moana” remade cost something north of $250 million. And this weekend, it needed to open HUGE to justify that. They’re on track to sell 3.5 million tickets to this on its opening weekend. That’s pitiful as summer kiddie blockbusters go.
This is a “Snow White” sized disaster.
Deadline/com is projecting, based on Thursday night ($4.5 million) and Friday’s ($13 or so more, a $17 million “opening day”) that $45 million is the film’s low ceiling for opening. And it may bottom out at $40.
The third weekend of the underperforming “Minions & Monsters” will top out at $20.
“Toy Story 5” is sticking around, and contributing to the log-jam of worn-out “family” franchises at the movies with an $18 mllion take, clearing the $400 million mark, an exception to the “rule” that maybe family filmgoers are tired of the same-old/same-old from the usual suspects.
Reviews for “Moana” have been as wearied as you might expect. We’ve been there, seen that. And you expect us to pay Trumpflation prices to see this again?
Sam Raimi’s career-making “Evil Dead” franchise has his input on the script, but a new director and cast Indifferent reviews aren’t helping or hurting “Evil Dead Burn,” as this installment is on track to clear $15 million for fourth place, something over one million tickets sold.
“Young Washington” didn’t cost a fortune and isn’t doing badly on its second weekend — over $6, under $7. That’ll keep it in the top five for one more weekend (fifth).
The remade-all-over-the-world Spanish tale of “The People (Neighbors) Upstairs,” aka “The Invite,” opens wide and is seeing a decent turnout, enough to drop it into sixth place. All the budget went to director and star Olivia Wilde, co-stars Seth Rogen, Penelope Cruz and Edward Norton, and to the Spanish screenwriter whose script has been recycled into Czech, German and now English. It only cost $20 million. Probably only spent a few days actually in San Francisco filming exteriors, and had a very short shoot schedule. It’s on track to clear $5 million. Go see it.
“Disclosure Day,” the summer’s Horror Film Phenomenon “Obsession,” “Backrooms,” the other phenomenon from the horror side, and probably “Jackass” will flesh out the top ten. The “Scary Movie” reboot will say “Adios” having earned almost $110 million.
Franchise sequels, remakes, reboots, a “Farewell to Jackass” and Spielberg’s latest “They’re LYING to us about ALIENS, you GUYS!” makes up the entire top ten, save for “Obsession,” “Washington” and “Backrooms.”
I’ll update those tallies later as the also-ran’s ticket sales are fleshed out by fresh data.


