Netflixable? “Royalteen: Princess Margrethe” shows us Mean Royals Have Feelings, Too

I could not WAIT to get to the Norwegian “Royalteen” sequel, “Royalteen: Princess Margrethe,” (he lied). I mean, what could top that soapy “going to high school with royalty and falling for a prince” fairytale with “real teen” sex and profanity and every other “issue” under the sun complicating the affair?

“Princess Margrethe” leaves young lovers Lena (Ines Høysæter Asserson) and the curly prince Kalle (Mathias Storhøi) behind to tell the story of the Mean Girl half of the royal Norwegian high school twins. What made her mean? What keeps the meanness going? Let’s find out!

This sequel, also based on the YA novel by Randi Fuglehaug and Anne Gunn Halvorsen, is marginally more interesting because of all the things that hang over someone labeled “Miss Perfect” and “The Most Beautiful Woman in Norway” by the European press.

Margrethe, as interpreted by Elli Rhiannon Müller Osborne, has family responsibilities and a paranoia borne of a press and culture that’s just waiting for her and others in her family to take a wrong step.

That’s one reason why she was so freaked out by her brother’s crush on the “experienced” and complicated commoner Lena. But that’s not why Margrethe fainted at the prom in the last scene of “Royalteen.”

The opening of “Princess Margrethe” shows her being wheeled into the hospital and a doctor telling her and her parents about all the drugs in her system.

“Keeping this quiet” is only going to cover up so much. Flashbacks to that night remind Margrethe how she got so messed up, and the overly-attentive boy who got her that way.

Margrethe spends this sequel fretting over video that creep recorded that might get out, over the flirty Prince of Denmark not named Hamlet (Sammy Germain Wadi), whether to carry on with aspiring DJ Arni (Filip Bargee Ramberg), her brother’s pal and a guy who knows her better than anyone and pondering the state of the monarchy, her image and what is going on with her parents’ marriage.

Margrethe feels pressured by the one friend she has in the world (Amalie Sporsheim) to do what teenagers do and lose her virginity. But to whom? Prince Alexander of Denmark? Arni? Gustav the possible blackmailer?

Getting drunk widens her playing field to a stranger who protectively takes her home.

“You know, you HAVE to sleep with me,” she hiccups. “It’s in the con…consti…constiTUtion.”

Through it all, her depressed and often bedridden mother’s (Kirsti Stubø) words of warning hang over her (in Norwegian with subtitles, or dubbed into English).

“It’s not like we’re normal people.”

But in most ways, they are.

The misunderstandings are just as lame as in “Royalteen,” the “mysteries” are just as contrived and guessable.

But there are a few cute, if seriously cliched moments. As blah as it all seems to the jaded adults in the room, “Margrethe” might fill the bill for teens who want to see that “royalty has the same issues everybody else does” and live vicariously in this milieu, a “teen princess” movie with a profane, sexual and pharmaceutical edge.

Rating: TV-MA, substance abuse, sexual situations, a little nudity, profanity

Cast: Elli Rhiannon Müller Osborne, Filip Bargee Ramberg, Sammy Germain Wadi, Frode Winther, Amalie Sporsheim, Kirsti Stubø, Mathias Storhøi and Ines Høysæter Asserson.

Credits: Directed by  Ingvild Søderlind, scripted by Marta Huglen Revheim, Ester Schartum-Hansen and Per-Olav Sørensen, based on the book by Randi Fuglehaug and Anne Gunn Halvorsen. A Netflix release.

Running time: 1:38

About Roger Moore

Movie Critic, formerly with McClatchy-Tribune News Service, Orlando Sentinel, published in Spin Magazine, The World and now published here, Orlando Magazine, Autoweek Magazine
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