Classic Film Review: Still a hoot — Mssr. Belmondo’s Holiday — “That Man from Rio (L’homme de Rio)” (1964)

Adrien, dashing from 1960s Rio de Janiero to Brasilia, the then new capital of Brazil, in a pink 1929 Chrysler 75 adored with green stars, pulls over at the first modernist police station he spies.

He steps out of the ragtopped jalopy in nothing but boxer shorts, and proceeds to dress and babble in French — cigarillo dangling from his lips the whole time — to the befulled Portuguese-only speaking cop.

“Sir, could you please arrest me?”

“I’m a deserter. I lost my uniform. I flew without a ticket, conned an invalid. I fought with men of all colors and nations, and I drive around in a stolen pink car with little green stars.

“I’m also guilty of public indecency. The handcuffs, please!”

Adrien, played by international film icon Jean-Paul Belmondo, leaves out stealing a French cop’s Triumph motorcycle, sprinting miles on foot to an airport in pursuit of his kidnapped girlfriend, dodging dart gun bolts and fists, and when his own fists fail, kicking any villain he figures has it coming in the crotch.

And that’s before stealing an airplane he’s not quite sure how to fly, swimming miles to an oligarch’s yacht, dodging crocodiles in the Amazon and swinging like Tarzan from jungle tree to tree to free his dizzy beloved (Françoise Dorléac) in “That Man from Rio,” one of the great comic romps of the 1960s.

Filmmakers from the then-new James Bond franchise to Steven Spielberg would borrow from this spectacular action farce, which featured a future Bond villain (Adolfo Celi), locations cribbed for decades of other films and a finale that became a version of of the opening sequence of “Raiders of the Lost Ark” over 25 years later.

“Short Round” from “Indian Jones and the Temple of Doom?” His prototype is a pint-sized Afro-Brazilian shoeshine of many talents and connections named Sir Winston (Ubiracy De Oliveira), who saves Adrien’s French fried bacon more than once in this Oscar-nominated classic.

Director and co-writer Philippe de Broca’s Franco-Italian co-production serves up “The New Brazil” of the early ’60s — striking architecture, breathtaking scenery and poverty mostly glossed-over by the fresh-scrubbed faces of the “simple happy natives.”

The color film stock gives the picture a travelogue sparkle, and the stunts — with Belmondo plainly doing his own hair-raising motorcycle chasing, building dangling, diving, tumbles and crawls through brawls — can be pre-CGI jaw-dropping.

The plot? A couple of sketchy dart-gun wielding characters in trench coats swipe a statue of supposedly little value from a French museum. Professor Catalan (Jean Servais) has just enough time to tell the cops there were three such statuettes, and that they’re “cursed” before he’s kidnapped.


Agnes (Dorléac, of “Cul de Sac” and “Billion Dollar Brain”), the carefree daughter of a dead researcher who was with Catalan when they unearthed the statues, is also nabbed.

But Agnes was kidnapped right in front of her home-on-leave soldier, Private Adrien Dufourquet. He springs into action, a man of no “particular skills,” but a headstrong, impulsive rescuer on the fly.

He has no idea who took her or where they’re taking her. But he wings it westward with her kidnappers, unable to convince the flight crew of the jetliner he conned his aboard that she’s been “taken,” and at every turn, he’s there — trying to free her, hopefully before his leave runs out the following Monday.

“The bad guys always win!” Agnes gripes, once the drugs that made her even dizzier wear off. And so it seems. But Our Man Adrien will see about that.

Cinematographer Edmond Séchan shot one of the greatest short films of all time, “The Red Balloon,” and gives us sumpuous scenery, an “Architectural Digest” visual appreciation of the New Brazil’s architecture, and the occasional stunning shot — Adrien and Sir Winston climbing a mountainside favela in silhouette at sunset to Sir Winston’s cute and cool stilt house.

The editing leans into the travelogue nature of this international production a tad more than is necessary to maintain the picture’s pace, but the movie doesn’t suffer much for it.

And Belmondo, in one of his most entertaining action roles, just hurtles across the screen — dashing and diving and pilfering and conning and driving and dodging punches and crashing through construction sites and swinging from vines and construction dolly cables and falling out of a plane.

Damn.

Most of the time, we can see that’s really him, and marvel at how perilous they made the stunts look around him. Belmondo’s charisma is well-matched to the out-of-his-element and had-about-enough Adrien, a simple and sarcastic man out of his depth long before he’s a fish out of water, or in it.

Director de Broca hit his 1960s peak with this film, and went on to make “King of Hearts” and decades of more lightly-regarded films after that.

The oft-dubbed Italian character actor Celi plays the oligarch behind this New Brazil modern architecture spending spree. He moved into the James Bond universe as Bond’s skin-diving foe Largo in “Thunderball.”

And Dorléac, one of the great screen beauties of her day, had her finest comic role in this film before her life and career were tragically cut short in a car accident that killed her before “Billion Dollar Brain” finished shooting.

Laugh out loud moments and “How’d they do that?” stunts aside, one of the great pleasures in viewing “That Man from Rio” today is to see how this film influenced the action films and action comedies that followed. By the time Roger Moore took over as James Bond, the series’ producers weren’t even hiding their debts to “Rio.”

Spielberg allegedly wrote the director to praise the film and claim he’d seen “That Man from Rio” nine times.

Whatever the influences it spread far and wide, the film today is a grand snapshot of Paris, Rio and Brasilia in the early ’60s, and a reminder that Tom Cruise wasn’t the first to figure out that doing your own stunts, when reasonable and even occasionally unreasonable, stamps an action film with bonafides that show up in the finished film, and in the actor’s confidence or even genuine skittishness while doing them.

The effort shows in ways we don’t just see on the screen. We feel it.

Rating: TV-MA, violence, mostly comical, smoking, drinking

Cast: Jean-Paul Belmondo, Françoise Dorléac, Jean Servais, Ubiracy De Oliveira and Adolfo Celi.

Credits: Directed by Philippe de Broca, scripted by Jean-Paul Rappeneau, Ariane Mnouchkine, Danie Boulanger and Philippe de Broca. A United Artists (Les Artistes Associés) release from Cohen Media Group on Tubi, other streamers

Running time: 1:54

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Movie Review: Pop Starlet Samara just keeps pushing Nutty Fan’s “love” over the “Borderline”

Samara Weaving is a Madonna-esque pop superstar stalked by Ray Nicholson in his father Jack’s full “Here’s JOHNNY!” nutjob mode in “Borderline,” a violent and crazed comedy about celebrity and the delusions it feeds to those who have it and those who psychotically crave to be near it.

It’s a dark subject. Ask Taylor Swift or any performer who has to keep bodyguards on duty and lawyers on retainer for restraining orders. Obsession with pretty pop starlets can be as pathetic and comical as those Tiffany fans depicted in the documentary “I Think We’re Alone Now,” or deadly dangerous. Remember the murdered singer Christina Grimmie?

Writer-director Jimmy Warden, who wrote “Cocaine Bear,” reaches for both in a darker-than-dark comedy about a brash star, the bodyguard who tries to show compassion for how she affects one fan in particular, and that one fanatic in 50 who turns out to be dangerous.

It’s more “Cocaine Bear” gonzo than subtle. But the laughs are big and bleak and sometimes bloody as one man’s deranged obsession comes to a head when he finally thinks he’s achieving his goal.

Set in the ’90s, “Borderline” follows Bell, a bodyguard who is both intimidating and certain of his threat assessment abilities. Eric Dane (“Grey’s Anatomy,” “Burlesque”) plays up the guy’s patience and compassion when he has to deal with the latest door-knock from wild-eyed Paul (Nicholson), a “problem” fan who is certain singer Sofia (Weaving) is his girlfriend.

Wearing his dad’s old suit and bringing a single rose to the door of her gated mansion (How’d he get that far?), Paul sets off a few warning bells, which Bell is sure he can unring. That gets him stabbed enough to die, but he doesn’t. And that gets Paul inside Sofia’s mansion, bubble-bathing and Tom Cruise “Risky Business” dancing until he decides to turn himself in.

It’s a good thing Sofia was on the road with her “Deranged” tour.

For some reason, she brings Bell back on the job six months later. You’d think nearly getting yourself killed and potentially exposing your client to a nut with a knife would be a firing offense. But no.

Bell clocks back in just as Sofia is finishing up her fun with her latest plaything, a star NBA point guard (Jimmy Fails) who lets her crossdress him up and take him out to her favorite clubs. But he’s just figured out that, like her passion for jigsaw puzzles, he’s useful only until she’s “figured” him out down to the last piece. He’s about to go “back in the box.”

That’s the very moment that Paul, working with a fellow mental patient (Alba Baptista) and a too-loyal lump of a friend on the outside (Patrick Cox) breaks out of the mental institution and sets in motion his murderously cunning plans to live his dream.

Weaving gives Sofia the arrogance of the rich and famous, shrugging off suggestions she’s treating this point guard as a plaything, refusing to let herself be shocked or even that afraid when intruders get into her house. Ms. “Rich is a state of mind” has the brazen bravery of someone too insolated from real world problems to believe that anything bad can happen to her.

Point guard Devonte names songs by Cyndi Lauper and Madonna as his favorites, which does more to push Sofia over the “Borderline” than any violent threat staring her in the face.

Nicholson leers and mugs and oh yeah, we see the family resemblence in Paul’s more deranged moments.

Dane plays the straight man in all this, cast to set up tough guy/hero expectations which Bell may or may not live up to.

Random bits score the biggest laughs. A cop is summoned at one point, but he (Matthew Del Bel Belluz) is so distracted and unprofessional as to make us wonder if he’s another accomplice. No, he’s just got an audition in a few hours. He runs through Fred Astaire’s “Top Hat” song and dance when he’s supposed to be watching for creeps behaving creepily.

And that petite “fellow inmate” who escapes with Paul? She’s French. And you know how they are about Celine Dion.

Like “Cocaine Bear,” “Borderline” was built with “midnight movie” appeal in mind. And even if it never quite adds up to more than that, it doesn’t disapoint.

Rating: R for graphic violence and profanity

Cast: Samara Weaving, Eric Dane, Ray Nicholson, Alba Baptista, Patrick Cox and Jimmy Fails

Credits: Scripted and directed by Jimmy Warden. A Magnet release.

Running time: 1:34

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Netflixable? A Norwegian remake follows a drunken, aimless skier on “The Wrong Track”

One of the more disillusioning aspects of the Golden Age of Content is the way Netflix repurposes intellectual property and remakes films for different markets.

Spanish films get almost pointless Mexican or Argentine remakes, and vice versa. And it all comes home to roost when they share these Around the World with Netflix variations on the same platform — North American Netflix, for instance — at the same time.

Right now, you can choose between the new Norwegian (dubbed or subtitled) rom-com “PÃ¥ villspor” (“The Wrong Track”) or the original Swedish film, “Ur spÃ¥r (“Off the Rails”).

Not sure why the Norwegians would remake a Swedish skiing comedy that came out just a couple of years back, but that’s Netflix for you. They’re different, with a lot of charm of the first version of this story about finding purpose via the Scandinavian version of a winter marathon — a long cross-country ski race — wrung out of the Norwegian version.

But with its rural scenery and Nordic Olympic (Lillehammer and environs) locations, “Wrong Track” can claim the edge in that regard.

The set-up — a screwup, “never finishes anything” single mom who quits jobs and bungles mothering enough that she’s about to lose custody — is coerced into taking up cross country skiing by her seemingly-has-it-all-together older brother.

As Emilie (Ada Eide) struggles with the training and the reckoning this take-stock quest of skiing The Birken imposes on her life, will she finally get purpose and maybe find love along the way? As we learn that focused, motivated, Volvo driving yuppie brother Gjermond (Trond Fausa) has his own struggles — with a marriage (Marie Blokhus plays Silje) suffering from their inability to procreate, what will this “test” teach him?

One of the cutest elements of the original film, how odd it is for a Scandivanian to not know even the basics of skiing, is missed here.

The sex and romance elements are more abrupt, perfunctory and charmless in this take. But they go for the same upbeat, heartwarming feel in the finale, which plays about the same.

I’d suggest you skip “Wrong Track” and watch the Swedish original, since you sure as shooting don’t want to sit through two and the Norwegian “Tracks” feels more clumsily manipulative.

But both flirt with that “watchable” threshold thanks to scenery, engaging actors and people who have learned to do more than just put up with having too much snow for their own good.

Rating: TV-MA, sex, nudity, public urination gags, profanity

Cast: Ada Eide, Trond Fausa, Christian Rubeck, Idun Daae Alstad, Deniz Kaya and Marie Blokhus.

Credits: Directed by Hallvar Witzø, scripted by Lars Gudmestad and Vilde Klohs, based on the script for the Swedish film, “Ur spÃ¥r” by Maria Karlsson A Netflix release.

Running time: 1:34

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Movie Review: Dito Montiel rounds up Murray, Coolidge, Davidson, Union and Ed Harris as “Riff Raff”

The trailers hint that there might be laughs, that the tone of “Riff Raff” — a dark and bloody comedy about hit men, family, and how those two only exist together in the movies — could very well come off.

Jennifer Coolidge and Bill Murray rarely do us wrong. Ed Harris brings gravitas and reality to every role he plays. And Gabrielle Union is here to class up the joint.

Pete Davidson? Well, it’s a hit man comedy, so there’s a chance he’ll get popped. Remember how we all laughed and laughed when that happened in “Bodies Bodies Bodies?”

But then there’s the moment in the opening credits, when you’re walking in on a small distributor’s comedy and you see the “Directed by Dito Montiel” on the screen. And there’s nothing for it but to mutter Gordon Ramsay’s favorite expletive.

“F— me.”

Directors aren’t wholly responsible for whether a film comes off. Casting a movie well does wonders. But if a script has a scrap of promise to its premise, the director of “Man Down,” “Boulevard,” “”A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints” and “The Clapper” is your best bet to turn it into a Golden Raspberry Awards contender.

“Riff Raff” lives down to its title, a trashy movie with a gilded cast — a cast a tad tarnished thanks to the addition of this to their resumes.

Actor-turned-screenwriter John Polono (“Stronger”) cooked up a story of a mobster who’s buried his past, remarried and made a better life, two mobsters hunting him down via his unfortunate son and alcoholic ex, and a trio of varying-degrees-of-“innocent” bystanders, starting with the mobster’s adopted, Dartmouth-bound teenaged son.

Murray is the old trigger man they call “Lefty,” bluff and blunt and bullying around his amoral protege, Lonnie (Davidson). Something puts Lefty and Lonnie on the trail of an old acquaintance.

That would be Vincent (Harris), doting stepdad to smarty-pants D.J. (Miles J. Harvey), worshipful husband of too-classy-for-him Sandy (Union).

The intrusion of Vincent’s son from an earlier marriage, Rocco (Lewis Pullman), Roccos’s very pregnant Italian girlfriend Marina (Emanuela Postacchini) and Vincent’s blackout drunk ex-wife (Coolidge) is Vincent’s first clue that something awful is up.

“What’d you do this time?” is how he greets his adult son. “You sure cuss a lot when Rocco’s around” is the Dartmouth-bound smart kid’s astute observation. Seeing as how his dad is compulsive model boat carver forever giving him “Don’t ever settle” lectures on a girl who just used and rejected D.J., that should be a tell for D.J. and his mom.

Ruth, the boozy, unfiltered ex who gets “horny when I’m scared,” cuts to the chase.

“You don’t know him (Vincent) at all!”

The disparate characters are destined to collide in a country house high on a woody hillside in Maine. The tale of how they all got there and what the bad blood here is about is told out of order via flashback “revelations,” rendering it a style we’d call Tarantinoesque. We’d call the callous, amoral and seriously unfunny violence Tarantinoesque, too. But why drag a good if perhaps overpraised filmmaker into this?

From the first spilling of blood, “Riff Raff” grates and goes grimly wrong. Blundering hit men use each other’s names in front of a farm produce store owner, a scene that ends with “A History of Violence” slaughter. It’s repeated later with victims we could describe as “annoying” and overly-helpful.

Neither Davidson nor Murray can make these scenes, or later jokes about “torture” and reasons for wanting to do it pay off. The violence is random, awful and way out of proportion to what sets it off.

There are interesting twists to the plot, but the finale’s a fiasco followed by the clumsiest anti-climax of the new year. And too much of what precedes it is packed with simplistic attempts to let Murray/Coolidge/Davidson and Union do what they’ve done in other movies and TV series.

Davidson’s Lonnie is “a twitchy weasel?” Hardly a stretch.

Union is very good at playing prim, proper and PO’d with just her flashing eyes and a testy line.

“Can I get a word?”

Coolidge is the only one of the lot who manages a laugh, running her “MILF” based career second act through another wringer, struggling to score a giggle here and there at how vulgar, coarse and lowdown one oversexed drunk can be.

“White Lotus” reminds us she can be better than this, as indeed most everybody else here has demonstrated via their earlier credits.

Their director? Not so much.

Rating: R, violence, sexual content, drug use, nudity, profanity

Cast: Bill Murray, Jennifer Coolidge, Gabrielle Union, Pete Davidson, Miles J. Harvey,
Lewis Pullman, Emanuela Postacchini, Michael Angelo Covino and Ed Harris.

Credits: Directed by Dito Montiel, scripted by John Polono. A Roadside Attractions release.

Running time: 1:43

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Classic Film Review: Hackman’s a Working Class CIA Joe taking care of “Company Business”

Not every actor’s all that picky about her or his wardrobe. But the great ones are.

Glenn Ford didn’t find a character until he picked out just the right hat. Piper Laurie would fuss over what purse somebody she was playing would carry.

The late Gene Hackman? Hats and ties would tell the story.

So a movie about a CIA agent dodging “the Russians” and “The Company” in post-Berlin Wall Berlin might demand a trench coat. But Hackman always gave his characters with working class origins a tie tied entirely too short. And the hats were something you might see on your average New York cabbie of the day.

When he played high priced lawyers, presidents and such, the tie was normal length. But for a Popeye Doyle (“The French Connection” movies) or ex-CIA agent Sam Boyd in “Company Business,” the tie was short and the cap was baldspot-hiding working class.

The film, a serio-comic cat-and-mouse chase through Berlin and Paris, probably seemed a safe bet in 1990-91. Nicholas Meyer, who scripted “Time after Time” and whose light writing and directing touch saved the early “Star Trek” movies, cooked up a sort of “Hopscotch” comic thriller/working vacation in Europe for the Oscar-winning Hackman, paired up with Russian dancer/sex symbol turned actor Mikhail Baryshnikov.

But even if the film gave Hollywood the sense that veteran villain Kurtwood Smith (“Robocop”) could pull off perpetually PO’d in comic strokes, setting him up for “Hearts and Souls,” “To Die For,” TV’s “Big Wave Dave’s” and eventually “That ’70s Show,” “Company Business” barely manages a chuckle.

The set pieces are cleverly handled, the action beats play and the picture moves along at a nice clip. And Hackman — 61 when this caem out — is in fine form, giving better than the whole enterprise probably deserved. But if this is one of the forgotten titles of Hackman’s last decade on screen, there’s a reason.

We meet “old guy” Sam as he’s pulling a documents heist the Old School way — busting into headquarters in black mask and jumpsuit, dodging the guards, rappelling down a wall from an upper story of the glass-encased promontory to make his getaway.

The next day’s visit to his handlers gives away the game. He was stealing industrial secrets — cosmetics formulas. And a nerd in the lobby, also waiting to see the corporate types coveting this cache, got the same info simply by “hacking,” with the old guy tricking the kid to save face and his payment for the job.

When his former employers summon him to Langley with their old “Who do you like in the Fifth?” (a horse racing cliche) phone call, Sam’s first question is the only one that matters.


“Why take the battleship Missouri out of mothballs?”

Sam’s a Cold Warrior, and the Cold War is over. The Berlin Wall’s down. And we’ve already heard the CIA brain trust (Kurtwood Smith, Terry O’Quinn and others) gripe that they “HATE old guys” like Sam.

But there’s one more “exchange,” a long-imprisoned U2 pilot they can get for a chunk of cash and a Russian spy they’ve held for seven years. Post Iran-Contra, this bit of spookwork has to be off-the-books, as they’re using a Colombian drug lord’s cash and they don’t want Congress coming after them and Sam, who’d be an “Oliver North without all the medals” if caught.

Sam dutifully accepts the cash, fetches the Russian Pyotr Grushenko (Baryshnikov) and gets him to Berlin.

The banter is mostly dull and ill-considered, as the eagle-eyed and memory like a steel-trap Sam can’t recall the name of the vodka that the Russian keeps recommending.

Berlin’s sex district would make a great hide-out when things go haywire, and Meyer tries to find some fun in that. A transgender bar with a version of Marlene Dietrich singing “See What the Boys in the Backroom Will Have” (from “Destry Rides Again”) is about as funny as all the gay references get.

Baryshnikov wouldn’t show a lot of comic flair until his last significant role, a story arc on “Sex and the City,” later in the decade. Lines muttered about his reluctance to “go home” — “Who do you think I am, E.T.?” — fall flat.

Smith and O’Quinn take sturns sputtering “It’s no longer fashionable to ransom hostages with Colombian drug money!” and “What’re you trying to do, restart the COLD WAR?”

The American Sam may crack that “We still have Fidel,” when it comes to international boogeymen for the country to obsess over. Petulent Pyotr could still crack back “So do WE.”

Not a knee-slapper in the lot.

Screen icon Hackman’s workmanlike turn holds the picture together, as far as that goes. But in a movie that tries to work up a fine comic fury over Reagan/Bush crimes and criminality, and that proves to be an exercise in futility. Nobody was hearing that.

The next year, Bill Clinton would win the White House because the clueless patrician Republican Bush didn’t know the price of a gallon of milk.

And lines about how “The Japanese own your whole f—–g country” may be reminders of how long “The Japanese Century” lasted about ten years. But for a viewer today it just underscores that “The American Century” is certainly over and with half the country voting to emulate Russiam Cold War action comedies have lost any cachet they once had.

Rating: PG-13, bloody gunplay, nudity,

Cast: Gene Hackman, Mikhail Baryshnikov,
Géraldine Danon, Terry O’quinn, Oleg Rudnik, Daniel van Bargen and Kurtwood Smith

Credits: Scripted and directed by Nicholas Meyer. An MGM release on Tubi, other streamers.

Running time: 1:38

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Netflixable? Mexican Commandos fend of the “Dogs” of a Cartel — “Counterattack (Counterstrike, Contraataque)”

An elite Mexican commando unit battling cartels and corruption must shoot and fight its way north — to safety in Brownsville — in the chest-thumping shoot-em-up “Counterattack.”

Nothing is made of that irony, and that’s just one of many loose threads in this loose cannon B-movie from South of the Border.

Luis Alberti is Captain Guerrero, who finishes up an afternoon of drinking and gambling with a pal by intervening when two women (Mayra Batalla and Frida Jiser) trying to report a mass grave they’ve found are hassled by cartel goons and corrupt cops.

The captain is so celebrated and intimidating that he wins the stand-off with a legion of armed mob minions and local police, and gets to just walk away after having shot a couple of bad guys — including one with a badge.

That’s the logic here. Don’t judge “how they do things in Mexico” and don’t pay too much attention to how things transpire. Try not to get too far ahead of the utterly formulaic plot and don’t sweat the layers and layers of plot lapses and genre tropes and cliches.

When’s that next shootout, compadres?

Captain Guerrero is part of a unit called Murcielagos — “bats.” The cartel leader they’re hunting (Noé Hernández) and his brother (Israel Islas) have it in for these soldiers, blaming them for killing their father. That’s why they filled a ditch with dead soldiers, which the two women — one of them on her way for an abortion — find.

The villains ambush Guerrero and his closest subordinates — nicknamed Tanque, Pollo, Toro and Combo (Leonardo Alonso, Luis Curiel, Guillermo Nava, David Calderón León) — when they’re off duty, heading north for a U.S. shopping trip.

When the army men turn the tide and wipe out their ambushers, it’s game on as they’re on foot, the bad guys’ “dogs” are in pursuit (Ishbel Baustista plays their ace tracker) and the only hope for our heroes is a “safe” extraction either near the border, or across it in Texas.

The movie sets up several promising subtexts, and all but forgets almost every one of them as we lurch from shoot-out to shoot-out, with the Murcielagos battling long odds and never missing what they aim at — unless it’s a senior bad guy, whom they wound. So he can make a speech.

After every firefight that the five survive, they “report,” aka “sound off” — “Combo STANDING,” “Tanque STANDING…”

The shootouts are first-rate, in that “bad guys mostly miss, good guys never do” way.

Alberti is a most charismatic lead, and Hernández does what he can with the doting dad/ranting, raving and murderous drug lord at work stereotype. The willowy Bautista was an interesting choice to play the tough broad killer/tracker “Cobra.”

But nothing here is written or directed in a way to make it memorable beyond that moment when the credits start and Netflix is trying to convince you to begin watching something else without giving you the chance to say “Not so fast.”

Rating: TV-MA, graphic violence, drug abuse, profanity

Cast: Luis Alberti, Leonardo Alonso, Luis Curiel, Guillermo Nava, David Calderón León, Mayra Batalla, Frida Jiser, Ishbel Bautista, Israel Islas and Noé Hernández

Credits: Directed by Chava Cartas, scripted by Jose Ruben Escalante Mendez . A Netflix release.

Running time: 1:24

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Movie Review: DIY Cinema at its Indian Best — “Superboys of Malegaon”

A plucky crew of India’s working poor, tired of being busted for pirating movies, set out to make their own in the amusing and engaging true-story dramedy “Superboys of Malegaon.”

They’re do-it-yourselfers of the most adorable variety, turning a bicycle with training wheels into a camera dolly and a loom operator in a sweatshop into a superhero in a picture that’s a little “Meet the Fabelmans,” a little more “Cinema Paradiso” and a lot “Be Kind Rewind.”

Nasir is a film fanatic working in his brother Nihal’s Prince Video Parlour in 1990s Malegaon, a little regarded backwater city in Western India. Nasir (Adarsh Gourav) adores Keaton and Chaplin and can’t understand why the locals won’t show up when he puts their silent films on the screen of this “parlour,” which is more a makeshift storefront cinema than a video store.

Who has money for VCRs or DVD players? Shell out a few rupees and watch whatever this parlour or its many competitors are “showing.” Yes, it’s “illegal.” But in a country famous for a century of traveling truck cinemas serving a cast country with few theaters and almost no TV sets, it’s a business model that fits the marketplace.

Nasir shares his love of Bruce Lee movies with the beautiful Mallika (Riddhi Kumar). But can a part time ticket taker at the Prince and sometime wedding videographer support a wife and family? His brother (Gyanendra Tripathi) knows better. Her family doesn’t think so, either.

Nasir watches movies like a student, straining to understand how scenes, close-ups and editing achieve emotional responses. He experiments with framing and shot selection as he shoots those wedding videos.

Being Muslim, he’s learned the difference between films that are chaste and “halal” and those considered too racy for Indian Muslim consumption — “haram.”That’s how he learns to edit, substiuting other scenes — often goofy — for romantic sexuality in the cinema. And that’s how he realizes he has a flair for visual comedy.

When the police single out the Prince Video Parlour for a raid, bribes won’t be enough to bring them back from the dead. They need unique content, big crowds and no raids or fresh bribes. Let’s “make our OWN movies.”

No, this isn’t Bollywood. But with assorted pals pitching in, the kid brother figures he can crank out a parody of an Indian hit for 12,000 rupees.

“Sholay in Malegaol” will “end all this nonsense about ‘piracy,'” he enthuses (in Hindi with subtitles).

His idealistic, prickly older writer-friend Farogh (Vineet Kumar Singh, quite good) will help him come up with a script. Others can pitch in as crew and even as actors. Some are born to be on camera. Will long-suffering weaver Shafique (Shashank Arora, terrific) realize his dream of escaping the sweatshops and acting his way to fame?

They need to find one Muslim woman willing to act, and act without a veil or hijab. The sassy dancer Trupti (Manjiri Pupala, delightful) will do it for a price. And perks — “separate dressing area” and somebody to look after her baby during takes — are a must.

The plot features artistic vs commercial debates between our director and writer, the uncertainty of whether the comedy they’re making will “play” for local audiences, domestic life changes and challenges and all the usual pitfalls of group filmmaking as it’s depicted in movies — some get “rich” and famous, others are misued, cast aside, passed-over.

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Movie Review: Cute and sweet and challenging — REALLY challenging — “The Unbreakable Boy”

In the years since Hollywood “discovered” autism, the tendency has been for movies to treat those carrying this burden as more “Rain Man” quirky and cute than “Rain Man” challenging.

Symptoms and behaviors might come and go as the plot required. The burden for the caregivers and for the person trapped in autistic tics, coping mechanisms and manias would show up as the occasional “reminder” of the day-in/day-out difficulties facing those diagnosed or undiagnosed and their families.

But the ebullient autistic child in “The Unbreakable Boy” reminds us that this malady is a lot to deal with. Because he’s a LOT. Period.

Austin, aka “Auz Man” is a manic chatterbox who lives his waking hours at near full speed and top volume. All it takes is a mean and clever classmate to crack “I want the truth!” to send Auz Man on an uninterruptible run through the entire “You can’t HANDLE the truth” speech from “A Few Good Men.”

Class at his Oklahoma middle school? It might as well be dismissed until Austin is done — which could be never as he’s memorized this entire movie, among many others — or removed from their midsts.

“The Unbreakable Boy” is a manipulative weeper that doesn’t so much hurl one huge challenge/obstacle/setback/test or unpleasant revelation after another at the viewer, as gently introduce them for our entertainment.

Austin is born not just with autism, but with Osteogenesis Imperfecta, brittle bone disease. He’s a manic, uncontrollable child who demands constant attention lest he heedlessly break another bone.

Austin’s mother Teresa (ahem) (Meghann Fahy) had it. That’s not something she mentioned on the first, second or third dates with his pharmaceutical-rep Dad, Scott (Zachary Levi). No, she brought it up after she lets baby-daddy know she’s pregnant, and before he’s learned her last name. Or that she’s been married before. Twice.

That’s OK, because Scott is an alleged grown-ass man who never gave up his “invisible friend.” Now “Joe” (Drew Powell) is dad’s invisible drinking buddy.

There’s an Oklahoma joke in all that. But the movie is too cheerfully upbeat and bubbly to tell it and frankly too-invested in turning this kid into a life-affirming metaphor for boundless optimism, ignoring all obstacles and sugar-coating a whole lot of problems that come with a family this challenged.

The line between “uplifting” and “cringy”; is a narrow one here.

In writer-director Jon Gunn’s script, chatterbox Austin (Jacob Laval) narrates the story of his life, mostly in a flashback from “the day everything broke” as his alcoholic dad took one drunken drive with the kids (Gavin Warren plays Auz-Man’s younger brother Logan) too many.

The endless parade of medical problems facing Austin’s birth and the accidental family formed by this child (Patricia Heaton of “Everybody Loves Raymond” plays dad Scott’s mother) can only be surmounted by constant adjustments, constant stumbles, the occasional ultimatum, a smile and a homily.

“I wish I could enjoy anything the way my son enjoys EVERYthing!”

There’s a faith-based subtext clumsily and half-heartedly grafted onto the story (Peter Facinelli plays a pastor who’s had his “challenges”). And the “true story” anchoring all this doesn’t tidy up the logic or unreality of it all. A tiny but telling example — there’s a father-son church group campout coming up. Scott drives a Toyota Land Cruiser, with roof rack, snorkel and front bumper towing wench. Scott lives in Oklahoma. But Scott tells us “I HATE camping!”

At least the kid is gratingly bubbly, if a tad insufferable.

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Movie Review: Divers race to save One of Their Own from Taking his “Last Breath”

Fear of the inky black void at the bottom of the sea and of drowning down there drives the simple but flawlessly executed diver-down thriller “Last Breath.”

It’s an almost-real-time account of a deep sea diving accident, and a film — like “Sully” or “Only the Brave” — that illuminates a little-appreciated profession and the professionals who practice it.

Director and co-writer Alex Parkinson based this film on a documentary he made on the same subject with the same title of a few years back, putting the story in the capable hands of Woody Harrelson, Mark Bonnar, Cliff Curtis, Simu Liu and others and underwater cameraman Ian Seabrook, who give us a tense, workmanlike look into one of the world’s most dangerous professions in one of the most forbidding environments on Earth — hundreds of feet underwater.

“Saturation” divers spend month-long shifts doing maintenance on North Sea oil pipelines and rigs, living and sleeping in pressure chambers, diving for hours at a time to prevent leaks and fix gear in the pitch-dark of the sea bed.

Harrelson plays Duncan, the old salt and veteran of the trade whose 20 year career is winding down. “Peaky Blinders” vet Finn Cole is Chris, Duncan’s young Scots protege with a new seaside Aberdeenshire manufactured home and a fiance (Bobby Rainsbury) to come home to.

Simu Liu is Dave, a “legend” of the profession, “The Vulcan,” they call him. And Cliff Curtis is the new skipper of the Tharos, the support ship that gets divers to and from “the worksite,” and which hovers over that site — in all sorts of sea conditions — when it sends them below.

That “hovering” is what goes wrong one night during a storm. The thrusters that maintain station for the Tharos quit, divers are trapped below and there’s only so much time to save them.

This “true story” sets up like a veritable primer on perilous workplace melodramas of the “Backdraft” or “The Perfect Storm” model. The characters are “types” — the guy with the gal he promises to come home to, the crusty veteran being put out to pasture who regales one and all with his “in MY day” claims about all you used to need to do this deadly work was “a little common sense and a bottle of Scotch.” Throw in the perhaps untested captain, the all-business diving veteran you can supposedly rely on and the improvising crew who scramble to save the day before the oxygen runs out and you’ve covered all the formula melodrama bases.

Parkinson knowing this story backwards and forwards means he’s become an expert on how to tease out the suspense and tug at the heartstrings with this material.

And that is the oxygen that “Last Breath” lives on — a “routine” day on the job that is anything but, an outcome which we fear will be the worst and the people trained to handle the situation thinking outside the box, and whatever their emotions, never panicking, keeping calm and carrying on.

Rating: PG-13, profanity, life-and-death peril

Cast Woody Harrelson, Finn Cole, Bobby Rainsbury, Mark Bonnar, MyAnna Buring, Kosph Altin, Cliff Curtis and Simu Liu.

Credits: Directed by Alex Parkinson, scripted by Richard LaFortune, Alex Parkinson and David Brooks. A Focus Features release.

Running time: 1:33

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Gene Hackman: 1930-2025

Ninety five years old or not, the news of Gene Hackman’s death still hits as a shock.

As to what happened and why, let’s not speculate on that and let the police/coroner findings tell that story of him, his wife and dog dying in their house.

An Oscar winner and one of the greatest screen actors of his generation, he was brilliant almost every time he stepped in front of a camera.

I had the pleasure of interviewing Hackman a few times, and like Kevin Kline, he was the same shy guy who turned up on talk shows. Almost too shy to chat up, it seemed.

Bill Murray and others might remember a hardass, exacting and brilliant, on the set. But Hackman always said he was trained to act, not to be a celebrity or be interviewed.

That cocky, blustery larger than life persona that turned up in many a film, debuting in “The Poseidon Adventure?” “ACTING” as they say.

I remember him apologizing for “Welcome to Mooseport,” because nobody wants to “go out with a stinker.” Just as Connery apologized for his final film.

“Bonnie and Clyde” to “Young Frankenstein,” “Night Moves” to “Heist” and “Unforgiven,” “Crimson Tide,” “Hoosiers” and on and on the filmography goes, an “American Master” PBS has yet to get around to lionizing.

Droll in “Superman,” silly in “Heartbreakers,” “Royal Tenenbaums” and “Get Shorty,” an action hero here and there — “The French Connectionmovies, “The Package,” “Mississippi Burning”…

Hackman never ever disappointed.

Hackman “closed the door” on screen acting decades ago, and co-wrote Civil War fiction and did radio interviews about that which I’d catch from time to time. He seemed to be enjoying that sort of retirement.

A great one has passed, and however he passed, he was a unique presence. Find some classic he was in and watch it tonight. I know I will.

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