Movie Review: “Against the Clock,” aka “Headlock” traps Agron in a Polish Joke

The lengths some guys will go to in order to get Dianna Agron to make out with them.

The first-time I paid attention to Mark Polish of the filmmaking Polish Twins (with brother Michael Polish) was when “Twin Falls, Idaho,” their breakout film came out. Interviewed them at the time.

That was way back in 1999. And honestly, the last time I noted them was with these Midwestern chroniclers’ “The Astronaut Farmer” back in 2006. The writing, directing and sometime acting Mark and writing and directing sibling Michael are making projects independent of each other these days.

But that’s not halted the downward spiral of their careers or critical reputations as evidenced by “Alarum,” one of this year’s worst-reviewed films (by Michael) and Mark’s disastrous sci-fi thriller “Headlock,” so awful that renaming it “Against the Clock” for release to streaming gives it no help at all.

As an actor, Mark Polish is generic in look and unexceptional in talent and screen presence. But he wrote and directed a futuristic CIA-reprogramming-human -tale and convinced Justin Bartha and Andy Garcia to sign on, and landed “Glee!” alumna Agron as his co-star.

Polish plays a spy caught up in spy games and head-doctor science that puts him in a coma in which his worried almost-a-widow battles the drawling, white-suited, cane-carrying Col. Sanders CIA chief (Garcia) over the contents of possibly-brain-dead Kelley’s brain.

There’s a terror mastermind, Ah Puch (José Zúñiga) that Agent Kelley and the Agency are chasing, and the CIA chief wants the “Intel” in Kelley’s head, which has been augmented and altered to maximize data input and retention, among other modifications.

If they want to know the full list of “target cities” Au Puch has in mind, beyond Venice, they’ll need to open that noggin. But Tess, Kelley’s defiant and fashion-forward wife, is doing her own hunt for the truth about what the CIA can and cannot do and will or will not say about their role in Kelley’s current state.

“The world is made up of TWO things, Black and White,” Garcia/CIA Chief Hotchiss bellows, in his best Foghorn Leghorn. “And there ain’t NOTHIN’ in between!”

“Against the Clock” is visually, aurally and scripturally incoherent, a blur of “Is he alive and ‘escaping’ while inside his head,” or are these the dying thoughts of an agent who sold his intellectual soul to The Agency?

Voices are almost constantly disembodied and echoey. Images range from hazy and out of focus to lurid and hyper “real.”

Polish makes one unfortunate technical decision after another, with overlit, washed-out “dream” sequences contrasted with the hyper-saturated colors of “reality.” Or is that vice versa? Context-free flashbacks that make no sense, montages of media coverage and the messy mental state of a man whose mind is no longer his own all jumbled together over a soundtrack that is almost start to finish a “mistake” the director insisted on.

There’s little here to grab onto and little to entice the viewer to stick with this formless fiasco to the end.

Having a “nightmare that THIS was a nightmare” and opening the film with a ponderous lecture on the brain’s computer-like capacity by a CIA brain-use futurist (Patrick Bauchau) does nothing to render the senseless sensible.

And Polish, as the disturbed, manipulated and “nightmare” within the nightmare mental state agenta compelling or even competent tour guide nor an emphatic hero that anybody roots for his drop dead gorgeous wife to “find,” revive or whatever in her quest to get to the bottom of a conspiracy.

But as least Polish got to lock lips with Agron a few times. Maybe to him that was enough.

Rating: unrated, violence

Cast: Dianna Agron, Mark Polish, Justin Bartha, José Zúñiga, Patrick Bauchau and Andy Garcia.

Credits: Mark Polish. A Gravitas Ventures release on FilmRise, other streamers, Patrick Bauchau

Running time: 1:47

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About Roger Moore

Movie Critic, formerly with McClatchy-Tribune News Service, Orlando Sentinel, published in Spin Magazine, The World and now published here, Orlando Magazine, Autoweek Magazine
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